Making a music video never felt so good because… make up by no one, hair styling by no one, clothes from my wardrobe 😎

Isn’t life about striping off all the excess layers put on us by society and finding our way back to the essence of who we are…. Easier said than done. Try, try again. 

Got this new song coming soon… you can pre-save it https://ffm.to/alonecatcanteri 

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It’s strange reading over these lyrics… you know, when you look at your work and think… how did that happen?

I guess this one is about disconnection from one’s self, trying to bring yourself back to a place where you can tune into your emotions and listen to what you need, and make choices based on that.

I guess it’s aspiration in that sense.
I’m still so easily swayed by what other people think and feel, like someone out at sea on a little boat, laying peaceful on their back, watching the sky change colour, not realising their course is being altered by the tide…
If you’d like to hear it, down the track when it lands… you can pre-save
https://ffm.to/alonecatcanteri

Jumpin round, upside down I can’t reach you in those clouds
I know that I’m in this world alone
Always struggled with neglect now I’m swinging by my neck
I know that I’m in this world alone

​Many troubles in my time
Can I see what’s down the line
Weathered body, weathered mind
Oh I just need to unwind but

I can’t reach ya in those clouds

When you’re down they lock you up, knock out your teeth and steal your cup
So you think that you’re in this world alone
You been fighting for so long, you’ll always sing this song
So you know you’re not in this world alone

Many troubles in your time
Can you see what's down the line
Weathered body, weathered mind
Oh ya just need to unwind but
​
I can’t reach ya in those clouds

People see our troubled look, they know that it’s no good
We’re hurting all the time and need that piece of mind
Like a whippet with a bone we just won’t let this go cause we 
Gotta know we’re not in this world alone

Jumpin round, upside down I can’t reach you in those clouds
I know that I’m in this world alone
Always struggled with neglect now I’m swinging by my neck
I know that I’m in this world alone
Know that I'm in this world
Know that I'm in this world alone

​Here's my new song, Lost Years. You’ll hear it’s a departure from my usual style. My creative process for this one was quite different. Trawling through my 'voice memo' app late one night, I came across a simple but catchy guitar motif, I hit repeat and wrote the lyrics in a short time, then headed upstairs and started recording the song.
 
There was no pressure. Enveloped in the adrenaline of creating, I laid down tracks and tinkered with the arrangement and instrumentation to my hearts content. I sent the song to my email and spent months listening to it on repeat as my run sound track, diggin’ the vibe and thinking about maybe re-recording it with someone else at the helm, a little faster and in a higher key.


Eventually I decided that this was how the song was meant to be. It was created without my usual background anxiety of wanting acceptance or to impress my peers.
 
In 2018 I had the classic ‘post-album burn out’, crushed with my own expectations and punishing myself for not doing certain things better or being more organised. From the outside it probably looked like a pretty well executed album release and tour, but even before the tour had begun my brain was already deep in despair feeling under prepared musically.
 
Doing this single release has been a really great process for me. When I got bogged down in decision-making I reminded myself that nothing will ever be perfect and to try to keep my viewpoint zoomed out on the big picture.
 
My goal going forward is to release music more often, track by track, to be aware of my anxiety, it’s causes and deal with that it a healthy and compassionate way.
 
It’s really easy to do nothing with your music, keep it private, dream big in your spare time. I’ll keep reminding myself it’s better to do something, anything, that spending time chained to my sky-high expectations, wishing I did something with that song.
 
Thanks so much for reading and listening, keep dreaming big, and putting those self-doubts in the back of your sock drawer where they belong.
 
X Cat

Hey all! I was really thrilled (and surprised) a few weeks back when I got word ABC Radio was playlisting my song 'How Crazy I've Been'. The song is about an egotistical singer who laments her band mates leaving, whilst simultaneously justifying her own bad behaviour and questionable (non existent) moral judgment.

Originally, each Verse/Chorus was to written from a different band members perspective... With three characters in total, I wanted each of them to be whinging and bitching about each other in a harsh but slightly comically way.

Band breakups are a funny (well not FUNNY) thing. What I mean is; when a band implodes it is really upsetting because through hours crafting songs, rehearsing, performing, drinking and spending exorbitant amounts of time together you create this real bond and sense of togetherness. In short, when it's good it's incredible, when it's bad... it's, well... it's pretty bad. I wanted to capture this in song, but with a sight tongue and cheek edge to it.

After spending months getting nowhere with the song I decided for practical reasons to pare the concept back, having just one character. I felt the most interesting character by far was the lead singer. In short she's been a total cow to her band mates, but she shrugs it off like it's no big deal and continues to suggest and they come back and play music with her again. 

Once there was just one character to deal with the song really start taking shape. The song, up to this point had been a 6/8 country barroom ballad type feel, but I decided to change it up to a rockabilly 4/4 type feel to match the vibe of the lyrics and kick the song along at a faster pace. 

A few weeks later, I found myself getting lost and bogged down in the final lyric details, this was when I got some input from Justin Bernasconi and Chester Cooney who made some cracking suggestions which helped lock down some choices and finish the song. 

From the get-go I started writing 'How Crazy I've Been' thinking "wouldn't be amazing if Dolly Parton sang this song"... reality kicked in once it was finished, I would have to be the singer. 

Thanks for reading... lyrics are below. 

HOW CRAZY I'VE BEEN - LYRICS
I saw a picture, three of us singin’
Back when we used to be friends
Songs and the whiskey never stopped flowin’
Till the sun came up again
 
Feelin’ so low drivin’ the highway
Wishin’ that you’d stayed, cause
Nothing compares to that good time feelin’
When we used to play
 
You’ve both forgotten the magic that happens
Right up there up on the stage
I wish you’d remember what you’re both missin’
And what we’re throwin’ away
 
It doesn’t matter if I stole your lover
Write it down in a song, cause 
Fans who love country, love all the heartache
It’s what keeps em comin’ along
 
Nobody cares that you don’t like me
No one cares you’re mad
You don’t have the guts to go it alone or
Make it without my band
 
You’ve both forgotten the magic that happened
Night after night on the stage
I wish you’d remember the high times you’re missin’
And what you’re throwin’ away
 
Cowboys can solve all their trouble
With beer at the end of the night but
Women like us never forget those
Shit things you said in a fight
 
I’ve been pretending it’s not my problem
I stabbed you in the back
I shoulda known all those years ago
Not to treat you like crap
 
With rose coloured glasses I looked back across
Those years we spent on the stage
If only I’d seen how crazy I’d been
You wouldn’t be walkin’ away 

🥝 Two years ago I started making trips out of Melbourne to play small country pubs alone. It was really exposing for my voice, songs and guitar playing and made me want to work on all three; in particular it propelled me towards focusing on my lyric writing. Since my teens, local songwriters have always been my primary source of inspiration, and writing for this album was no different. I was looking at the songwriting of Jed Rowe, John Flanagan and Michael Waugh for cues on strong narratives and lyrics as well as songs about Australian life. I wanted push myself further in my writing and to look back and know I’d given each song every possible chance of reaching it’s fullest potential. 🥝
I can listen back to the songs now with satisfaction ‘cause I know how much I put in… I didn’t quit when in the past I would have thrown in the towel, I didn’t settle on things when I knew they weren’t right or could be better. Hopefully when you hear these songs, you won’t hear the work, the frustration, the endless drafting, loosing the plot and the point and then finding them again. Hopefully you’ll hear songs that sound complete, whole and perfect, like they’ve always existed that way.
The area known as Melbourne’s ‘inner north’ is where I grew up, and still live today. Northcote, Nth Fitzroy, Thornbury, Preston, Reservoir, Fairfield, Alphington, Clifton Hill, I know their streets, shops, houses and people. I am, what I like to call ‘obsessively nostalgic’. Everywhere I go here, I have memories. I can look at the landscape through my eyes or through the eyes of me as a child. My mother, grandmothers and one great grandfather also grew up in this area. I travel the same streets; ride the same trams, and where ever I go I wonder what their lives looked like. I know some of their history, where they worked and lived, some of their stories.
The songs on Inner North are either set in the this area or are about it’s people, now or in times past. It wasn’t meant to be a concept album; I was just trying to follow that famous writing sentiment “write what you know”, and whist it’s a really personal record, they’re not all my stories, some belong to others, some are real, some are imagined.
Thanks so much for reading, loads more exciting things to announced in the coming week, stay tuned.
If you’d like to pre-order a copy of Inner North, private message me on FB or flick me an email at [email protected]
X Cat

After recording this track, I'd been dreaming of doing a DIY music video for it. My original idea was pretty simple, video a bunch of skaters down at Fitzroy Bowl interspersed with point of view shots from the skateboard in the different locations the character in the song sings about. After scoping out a few skateparks I realised pretty quickly that asking another skateboarder to do tricks for you on camera, for your own purposes, is a little bit like someone coming to your gig and asking to record them for a project they have no idea about nor connection too... it's not cool, and really puts someone on the spot.
 
During a visit to the bowl a young BMX dude of about 12 saw me with my skateboard and said “So are you gonna have a skate?”. I explained I used to skate here as a kid and haven’t done so in about 15 years. To this he replied “Ohhhhh, that’s cool! You should just do it, just drop in. You’ll remember how!” And so I did, and it was amazing! That was the beginning of me learning to skate the bowl again. I’m not great skater by any stretch of the imagination, nor was I when I was a kid, but that doesn’t matter. So this video in a way has turned into a document of me learning to skateboard again at 30 years of age, and why not! You gotta do it while you still can.
 
Aside from this, there are deeper issues, that Fitzroy Bowl touches upon. There are other elements, in between the lines of the story, that are hard to express in words. The spaces where this story takes place I know well, the primary school (North Fitzroy Primary School) in the story is my primary school, Edinburgh Gardens is somewhere we did sports days, I learnt to play tennis there, it's where we had Carols By Candlelight each year, we marched through it when our school protested the closure of the Fitzroy Pool in 1998.
 
All Nations Park was constructed when I was at Northcote High School and part of the push for Darebin Council to build a skate park there. My boyfriend and I were both skaters and we met at that skatepark. I worked at Kmart in Northcote Plaza (behind All Nations Park) for a few years after High School.
 
I was working the cash registers the night Tyler Cassidy was shot dead by police in All Nations Skate Park. I saw him walk into the store, and saw him walk out with the two kitchen knifes. Shortly after there was a lock down at the store. Once we were allowed to leave through the back, I asked a police officer what was happening, he said "Well, it's just about as bad as it gets over there" in a solemn voice.
 
It was only later I found out Tyler lived less that 100m from me, basically at the end of my street. It still think about his death every time I drive past the plaza and the skate park. 
 
Fitzroy Bowl is about a lot of things, the loss of friendship, the feeling of powerlessness and distress you feel when you're unable to help or have any control over a situation. The way we as adults distance ourselves from situations that are uncomfortable. How disadvantage, poverty and family violence are intertwined and have huge implications on lives of children in those situations. It impacts on their health (mental and physical), their education, their working lives and their lives as parents. As a teacher I feel so sad and angry when I hear discourse in the media about educational outcomes for children being about 'hard work'. 
 
It doesn't feel like I wrote the song anymore, it feels like I am the singer of this song, and that the song has a life and message of its own. 

Thanks to the musicians who performed on this song, Justin Bernasconi (electric guitar), Ben Franz (bass) and Justin Olsson (drums), and to Jeff Lang for producing it. 

This video was shot by Justin Bernasconi and myself on iPhone, and edited my myself on the humble program iMovie. 

Thanks for reading x

Cat